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airquotescon - Laugh now

Oct. 27th, 2004 09:57 pm airquotescon

By the way, I'd like to thank nickless for getting these files to me for uploading. =)

Friday Quotes

"Let's get off Sarah's tongue." - Sarah

"I can see my shake!" - Sarah, having fun with mirrored ceilings

"Another dead bird... What is the fascination, Amy?" - Sarah, looking through Amy's pictures

"It could just be someone's implant stuck to the ceiling." - Sarah

"I've never heard a Martin Luther King Jr. zinger before." - Nick

Sarah: "The monkey is above the jug. What does that mean?"
Amy: "Above the jugs."

"Numfar, do the Charleston." - Corde

"It was ScaperCon. You don't remember parts of that." - Rona

"A little problem with heads." - Rona

"If you couldn't find those three, head for the bar." - Rona, looking at SC2K1 pictures

"How can I get cleavage out of a T-shirt?" - Rona

"Whose butt is that?" - Corde

"I think you tried to show me everybody by their butts, and that's why I don't know who anybody is." - Corde

"I was possessed by my monkey." - Corde

"We need to get a sign with a butt on it: 'You are now entering ScaperCon.'" - Sarah

"If my brother were getting married and there was a Scaper gathering that weekend, you know I wouldn't be going to the wedding." - Corde

"Sober Girl knows the cleavage!" - Tinka

"I can recognize my own cleavage." - Tinka

"They're having a frog orgy in the swimming pool!" - Rona

"There's a little town in southern Indiana called Pilot's Knob." - Corde

"Nothing says lovin' like Sarah from the oven." - Corde

Corde, re: Nick: "We're trying to get him naked after how long?"
Tinka: "And it's Gary who said that."

Gary: "It's a TV/VCR combo with on-screen programming."
Everyone: "Oooh..."

"We don't mock cheap drunks." - Corde

Natalie: "Cuddle monkey."
Corde: "No, he's in the microwave."

"I can be an unauthorized vehicle if I need to." - Natalie, re: the sign for "Leyden Towing"

"And yet no talk of German sausage." - Corde

"Someone take a picture, for the love of God." - Tinka

"I'm not a lesbian, but I'd do her." - Natalie

"Dammit, I told you to wipe down the toilet seat!" - Rona

"I have to brood for like two hundred years to do the character." - Corde, trying to channel Angel

"Even hell has limits." - Corde

"My nipplette escaped!" - Sarah

"I still have a handful." - Sarah

"Now he's straddling my foot." - Tinka

"Monkey foot sex. Nothing sounds hotter." - Tinka

"Okay, take the nipplette out of your mouth when you say 'that's pornographic'." - Tinka

"At this time I have never been more glad that I don't drink." - Sarah, re: homemade Kahlua

"You may compliment the cleavage, but you may not say things like 'navel hairs.'" - Rona

"Like my new stud?" - Gary, channeling Tinka's roommate

"I have vibrating tribbles." - Rona

"Rona, you were born to be a porn star." - Tinka

"You try to tell him he's not real and three hours later you come out of an existential discussion wondering if *you're* real." - Corde, re: Bongo

"It was a game of dodge ball gone horribly wrong." - Rona

"Nick got a whopper in his bed. And I think Gary put it there." - Sarah

"I would have laughed had it been funny." - Rona

"We're young and bouncy." - Tinka

Saturday Quotes

"It might please you to know that if you turn on channel 22, you can watch the Breakfast Club in Spanish." - Rona

"Is Amy still here?" - Natalie

"I'm sorry, but lisping monkeys... Just doesn't do it for me." - Sarah, still dissing "Planet of the Apes"

"That guy is getting too much entertainment out of me." - Amy

< "The Breakfast Club" >

"And once again, I say you suck. Come on, baby, let's get it on." - Sarah

"Hit me, I like it rough." - Sarah

"They had me locked in. They knew I was a Scaper." - Laura, re: the restaurant workers

"They're cute, can I have some?" - Sarah

"I was slashing the principal and Judd Nelson." - Sarah

"Ooh, panties. I have some just like that at home." - Sarah

"We can too have an orgy - we have plenty of room!" - Sarah

"I'm not a nymphomaniac, I'm a compulsive liar. Does that turn you on?" - Sarah

"Most people call it bullying; we prefer the term bondage." - Sarah

"The Evil Empress Strikes Back." - Tinka

"Once you pop, you can't stop." - Tinka

"Do they have a clinic to take care of that?" - Sarah

"And I couldn't perform!" - Sarah

"And my dad kept saying, 'You're not good enough!'" - Sarah

"I traumatized Corde!" - Sarah

Sarah: "My dad doesn't think I'm good enough, either."
Corde: "Oh, ew!"

"I bet if I pulled its trunk, the light would go on." - Sarah

"We would never porn you." - Rona

"Are you pimping it with the straight girls?" - Tinka

"I can't get my clothes off fast enough!" - Sarah

"Just take the cream right off the top." - Gary

"Only you could be unfulfilled by a bowl of cereal. You ask too much of your breakfast foods and don't write that down." - Corde

"I need them to be very clean and very straight." - Tinka

"Somebody make a loose joke, please!" - Corde

"No, it's your turn to get naked!" - Sarah

"Let's all get naked and go to Domino's!" - Sarah

"Just commenting in general on your monkey." - Rona

"Ever have those days where you just don't feel fresh?" - Rona

"Those would be the 'come fuck me' eyes." - Tinka

"Do you always do this after sex?" - Sarah

"Now he's got a hard on. Look at that face." - Rona

"'Poor pubes' was just muttered in the other room so I had to go." - Tinka

"That's the most second grade thing I have ever heard in my life." - Tinka

"Hi, I'm a slut!" - Sarah

< /"The Breakfast Club" >

"My breasts are super!" - Corde

"Let's go get cuddled by a big Australian woman." - Laura

"I'm just the easy drunk." - Laura

"I never get enough." - Gary

Laura: "Where's Amy?"
Miranda: "She's trying to find her pants."

"If anybody gets groped, it's Amy." - Rona

"Do you have coffee on that cart?" - Laura

< The Fast and the Furious (in English) >

"Where the hell did he get the stick? Vin, I'm sorry, but you're in a stupid movie." - Sarah

"Oh, yeah, push it baby. Woo hoo, whoopity ding." - Sarah

Natalie, re: Vin: "He shouldn't ever have to wear anything."
Sarah: "Just me."

"No no no! Rewind! He talked!" - Sarah

"It's the little dragster that could." - Sarah

"I will not slash Vin, I will not slash Vin..." - Sarah

"Can't quite find the floppy there." - Nick

"I tell you, he should never go straight." - Sarah

< /The Fast and the Furious >

"Loki gave her tongue." - Rona

"I mentally telepathized." - Gary

"How much did the monkey have to do with this?" - Sarah

"They're pretty girls." - Tinka, said with a Happy Face

"It talks to my spleen." - Nick

"I'm a dark lord of the Sith, thank you." - Corde

"How many ovaries do you have in the house?" - Loki to Carlos

"When you took the picture of me and Virginia, did she have her hand on my tummy?" - Carlos

"He just got Noxema all over the phone." - Tinka

Corde: "It wasn't funny the second time, or the fourth time, and it's not funny now."
Nick and Natalie (unison): "What about the first and third times?"
Corde: "I hate siblings!"

"I thought I was gonna get mugged." - the lone non-Scaper in the elevator

"We need more help than one kindly waiter can give us." - Corde

"I'm removing your H." - Carlos to Rona

"I pouted myself into a cry." - Rona

"You think I worry about a butterknife to the head?" - Corde

"The disembodied hand is taking my water away." - Corde

"I have to dismember my food." - Corde

Rona: "Amy, what are you doing?"
Amy (looking at her pizza): "Checking for cardboard."
Loki: "The excavation went a little deep."

Carlos: "You need to suck harder."
Corde: "No, I need to blow."

"I didn't know it was gonna get loud." - Corde

"Corde's already panting over there." - Natalie

"Are we having a pillow pilferage problem?" - Rona

"We can even turn pillows into porn." - Rona

"I didn't even get to porn on that one." - Corde

Rona: "Penis."
Corde: "Aaaaaahhhhhh!!!!!"

"Carlos shooting for the cleavage." - Loki

"Ow, my eye!" - Carlos

"Thank you, pizza fairy." - Loki

"I hope the pizza fairy brings love and joy to all the children!" - Corde

"I thought you liked it forced." - Rona

"I would buy the Farscape porn movie." - Carlos

< "Doc Hollywood" >

"You can't leave, we haven't had the chance to jump your body yet. The pig is really disappointed." - Sarah

"One out of five Spanish people really hate this stuff." - Gary

Natalie: "When Orgies Go Wrong."
Gary: "3."

"I came here because my street corner isn't getting enough business." - Sarah

< /"Doc Hollywood" >

"Oh my God, another holiday ruined!" - Sarah

"That just sounds appropriate: 'I'll just put my pants back on.'" - Nick

"You're even scrawny in a squishy jacket!" - Rona

"I'm gonna be bi-smell." - Tinka

Sunday Quotes

< "The Wild Bunch" >

"Spaghetti western with salsa!" - Sarah

"I'm unfulfilled! Get back here, horse!" - Sarah

< "/The Wild Bunch" >

"Man down!" - Corde

"My boobs are moving to Australia and forming a colony of their own." - Corde

"< pop >" - Corde

Rona: "Free nipple ring with your Find It Now."
Sarah: "Just in case you ever lose your nipple."

Tinka: "How did a whopper get over here?"
Rona: "It popped out of Corde's boob."

Natalie: "Corde got me on the mouth."
Corde: "I was aiming for her cleavage."
Rona: "She's easily confused."
Sarah: "Because they're both gaping holes?"

"That's popcorn. We never had popcorn." - Nick, doubting the cleanliness of the room

< "Footloose" >

"You are one fucking whacked out bitch." - Sarah

"I better get some sex out of this or I should have just left you in front of the damn train." - Sarah

"I've decided it's taking too long so I've taken it upon myself to poison your cake." - Sarah

"The name of the bar: Hicks Express." - Sarah

"Booze me up, I'm not drunk enough yet." - Sober Girl

"I'm old enough to be your daddy, and I *will* be your daddy by the end of the night." - Sarah

"Let him go or I'll blind you with my hideously ugly shirt!" - Sarah

Nick: "God likes to dance."
Sarah: "He said so: 'Boogie down, baby!'" That's the eleventh commandment."

Natalie: "We're all getting laid!"
Sarah: "Except for the old lady in back of us."

"I must practice my blowing skills. Blow... blow... awww!!" - Sarah

"My boobs are under here, really." - Sarah

"I'm a real boy, but where's my woody?" - Sarah

< /"Footloose" >

"I always knew my degree would come in handy someday." - Sarah

"You're putting jokes in my mouth." - Nick

"I can make strangers into wiseasses." - Rona

"It looks like the devil pig." - Laura

"You guys scare me." - Miranda

Tinka: "Oh, there's testosterone on the field."
Rona: "Did they spill it?"
Sarah: "It leaked."

"If they're monkeys, they really should be headless." - Sarah, re: Planet of the Apes merchandise

"I like getting smacked." - Miranda

"Kick his butt! Break his legs!" - Sarah

"She did not just say 'sleep together in unity', did she?" - Sarah, re: Virginia

"< babble >" - Oscar

"*shriek*" - Natalie and Sarah in unison upon seeing Larraq for two seconds in the vid

"That's a damn good idea." - Virginia, re: an audience suggestion for bringing Zhaan back as a "guardian angel" type

Virginia: "She's just been replanted somewhere."
Laura: "Chia Pet!"

"It was absolutely foul." - Virginia

"Loki's been outed." - Laura

"Ooh, I look good!" - Heather

Nick: "What's wrong with you people?"
Miranda: "Everything."

"Do you want me to take this off of you?" - Natalie

"Take it off, take it off!" - Carlos

"That *does* look like a urine sample." - Sarah

"We're all gonna take a big picture together because we're all crazy." - Linnea

"Spot the loony." - Linnea

"Grabbing space, not the balls." - Theresa

"There's a big difference between Long Island and water." - Heather

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